A brilliant day with World Championship Tetbury Woolsack Races. After feeling truly knackered from presenting at the wonderful The Big Retreat Wales and a neurology flair up… but a commitment to meet my friend Sara and good intentions for I ‘must’ start working through some of the trauma pain instead of sitting with it any longer, I got to the start, just…
And Somehow I managed to lug my 15-20kg of wool up the 1:4 hill and win the Ladies race, then join the Mind Charity Team to whizz up and down, & win too……!!
14 sec faster I think than when I’ve done before, so ploymetrics, DNAFit, sand bags and park run have made a difference…. or too much Nutcessity, sorry mike I need to reduce this.
So this weekend was 6 years since I contracted Weils into post viral encephalitis. I felt ‘disappointed’ by not doing a charity goal this year. As much as I don’t like to use the word ‘cant’, I had to listen to my body for a bit, and the ‘weight (literally!)’, shame of everything & then self doubt (from suicides, ptsd, social media unkindness & ex’s relationship affair) from the last 24 months had caught up in Feb with severe nightmares daily…. ironic with what I do (yet the professional depth I’ve learned is another level now which is exciting) & we are all human beings and life is an experience.
I truly believe we have to take ownership and at some point commit to turning and facing the toughest stuff, choosing how it defines us, over letting it define us.
So with determined commitment from now, I’m going all in and this weekend was the start….
I could have easily not gone to Wales, and even more easily not gone to Tetbury. I was more nervous than I’ve ever been, vulnerable. Yet the power of vulnerability is where our strength lies, if we have courage to share (see post below).
So I didn’t raise money and do a big challenge this year (yet), but this felt bigger. The patience and pause, the heaviness, the resistance to live…. and now the quiet resolve to realign and commit, all in. I met amazing people, spoke on panels with a diverse and truly inspiring group of people.
I just know I really want each and every one of you to know you matter, just as you are, right now…… believe in you, just a tiny bit to start….. I am here to support you all the way, ( and I promise I am 100% supported with what I’m going through and fully love working, coaching and running my wonderful business with you all).
Through our darkest moments come our biggest magic and growth, if we dare to explore. I’m only touching the edges once again, yet I whole heartedly want to reconnect and offer you a depth and purpose of tools and stories to give you the courage to go all in with yourself, to trust yourself through the pain, and with the joy, to risk it all and positively live what ignites your mind, body and adventuring soul….
So somehow running up a crazy hill with a sack of wool on my back is like a metaphor for us all…..to let go of the weight which no longer serves us and to allow a sense of lightness, freedom and strength to be nourished and grow within, with patience, trust and commitment.
Bit of a big, random ramble about the wool sack race, but if it helps someone yay!
Big thanks to Sara’s Psychic Tarot Swindon for the fab photos & support.
To be confirmed but Listen in Radio 2 Live Tuesday 4th June for Kim’s interview with Claudia Winkleman.
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